i probably am

my best friend so far, who will always be looking out for my best interest voted:
YES, for denial.

my other best friend, who is just one of the nicest persons around voted:
NO, for denial.

so by the majority of 2 over 3, i hereby grant you the certificate of:
YES for denial. 
please seek help.

on another story, i have been made secretary by two organizations. is that awesome or what? no, not really actually. being a secretary means a lot of work and i like procrastinating. procrastinate and i, we go way back. we've known each other forever. now i might have to leave him because i have stuff to do. tsk. no more hanging out with my best buddy, procrastination. 

that's me, trying to be funny. sigh.

there are also a lot of assignments requiring us (3rd-sem TESLites) to do microteaching. meaning, actually carry out the lesson plan (huh i also hate lesson planning!) on our classmates (meaning, the classmates will be  "the students"). 

that's a scary thought. i think i don't have what it takes to be a teacher. 

learning to be a teacher? that's easy. and TESL is really fun. i enjoyed most of the classes - even the ones that brought me headaches. i love 'em all. but teaching for real? that's a whole other story.

teaching requires talent, that's what Sir Zaki said. if you don't have talent, that's fine but your road in becoming a good teacher will be an arduous one. 

i fear i don't have that talent. 

if you don't like my writing, here's a caterpillar.

denial state of mind

Denial, in ordinary English usage, is asserting that a statement or allegation is not true.^[1] The same word, and also abnegation, is used for a psychological defense mechanism postulated by Sigmund Freud, in which a person is faced with a fact that is too uncomfortable to accept and rejects it instead, insisting that it is not true despite what may be overwhelming evidence.^[2][3] The subject may use:

• simple denial: deny the reality of the unpleasant fact altogether

• minimisation: admit the fact but deny its seriousness (a combination of denial and rationalization)

• projection: admit both the fact and seriousness but deny responsibility by blaming somebody or something else.

- Wikipedia

after reading that extract above, i realize that people in denial really CANNOT HELP it but to stay insisting that a certain fact, despite the overwhelming evidence, is not true.

i'm gonna go on a data-collection duty. to find out if i am indeed, in denial. well, i'll only ask three people (already asked one);

my room-mate and best friend, who has always been calmly understanding,

my best friend so far, who will always be looking out for my best interest, and

my other best friend, who is just one of the nicest persons around. 

my room-mate and best friend voted:

YES for denial.

=.=